Nicole was beautiful,
vibrant, and single. She enjoyed life and loved God. Occasionally, she
was approached by interesting, single men, but never felt a serious
connection with any of them, until she met Jeremy. Their chemistry was
evident. As they grew closer, she began to envision a future with him.
To Nicole, being with Jeremy was like a fairy tale—a dream that had
become reality. He was gentle, attentive, and kind; not to mention, she
was extremely attracted to him. They dated for three months, but then
dating turned into hanging out (sexually involved). By the time
they had known each other for a year, they were inseparable, but had
never discussed the status of their relationship. “I love him, Miranda,” she told her best friend one evening. “I know he’s the one.” Nicole decided it was time to get married, and that night, she would initiate the discussion.
The Friend Zone
Are you dating? If your answer is complex, you are not alone. Many singles struggle with dating issues, particularly when the terms of their relationships are unclear. In some cases, one party defines the relationship as a “friendship,” while the other feels absolutely certain that he or she is entering a committed, romantic relationship.
For Christians, it is especially risky to blur the line between the two. Emotional attachments form quickly and can be very hard to break. When it comes to avoiding dating traps, establishing honesty and boundaries, every step of the way, is the safest policy. Here are some tips for positive dating experiences:
- Develop friendships. Avoid making romantic gestures or putting yourself in compromising situations, even if you are attracted to the other person.
- Get acquainted. Get to know a person through group outings or in other comfortable settings. The way we behave around our friends reveals a lot about our true personalities.
- Look beyond the physical. Do not assume he or she is “the one” just because of physical attraction. Give your friendship time to develop.
- Don’t assume anything. Get to know a person and his or her intentions before you begin to envision him or her as your mate. For example, if the man you are dating has not proposed to you with an engagement ring, do not start planning your wedding!
- Make a decision. Determine what you want from a particular relationship and refuse to compromise your standards.
- Be honest. Let your friend or potential mate know your intentions and never take advantage of, mislead, or use another person.
- Don’t linger. If someone is not interested in you, move on. God knows what you want and what you need.
- Allow the Holy Spirit to guide your decisions. He knows what is best!
No comments:
Post a Comment